My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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