Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
"it" just moved
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
