I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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