she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just pee around me
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
