Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
