its not stalking. its research.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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