If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
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