the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
