Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
