i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
