as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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