Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
