No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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