I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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