Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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