i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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