like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
