lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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