Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
In America we eat man semen.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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