I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
