Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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