It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
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