so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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