If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
