I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize