I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
she peed on how many people?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
