So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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