She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
im holly from the hills drunk
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
