dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
