I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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