why didn't you poke me back
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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