So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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