I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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