; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
