People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
