So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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