Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
