I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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