Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
