never play flip cup with pint glasses
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
