how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
