I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
