He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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