singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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