wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
