Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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