Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
