Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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