We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
