She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
